Easily, and usually rightfully the butt of jokes. We quickly learn and are conditioned to take it. But deep within us is a heart crying out to be understood…to connect…to be heard.
One of the great things about us fellas is we are generally uncomplicated creatures and most of the time it’s not difficult to make us happy.
The exception is when it comes to relationship issues. As a sociology major, I loved taking part in, and studying the results of, a recent survey. They asked us guys to fill you in on what women everywhere need to know. With guaranteed anonymity I trust most of us were very honest (occasionally, brutally so).
Here are a select 18 things we men wish you women understood about us. While your man may not agree with all 18, if he is honest, many apply:
1. I think about you more than you realize. I just don’t phone or e-mail you every time it happens.
2. Making me ask a man for directions is like me telling you to ask another woman for fashion advice.
3. If I stand a chance with you, never play hard to get. I’m so freaked out by rejection I’ll just assume you aren’t into me and stop calling.
4. Ask me to do something for you and you’ll remind me I’m a man. Tell me how to do something and you’ll remind me of my mother.
5. Telling me I’m right – no matter the topic – will score major points with me.
6. I’m sensitive about my body but I won’t admit it. If you point out my stomach flab I’ll probably shrug off the comment in front of you, then privately check out my stomach later.
7. It’s not a good idea to read something into every word I say when we fight. I’ll be caught off-guard. For me, it’s like trying to pass an oral exam I never knew I had to study for.
8. If I say you look nice when I show up, it’s polite. If I say it later on, it’s an excuse to stare.
9. I have at least one ‘girlie’ song on my iPod. But I’ll deny knowing how it got there if you ask.
10. I pick out clothes that feel good. If you want me to dress cool, get something comfy.
11. When you get up from our table at a restaurant or bar to go to the bathroom, I scan the room to see who checks you out.
12. Seeing your feisty side makes me feel as connected to you as you do to me when I’m sensitive.
13. Looking at other women does not mean anything other than that someone’s outfit happens to be more revealing than yours.
14. Making me carry your bag in public may be helpful to you but it makes me feel like I’m wearing a skirt: emasculated. If you ask me to carry it all the time I’m going to resent it.
15. Want me to watch more chick flicks with you? Then don’t tell all your friends how I got tearful during the last one. My reputation is at stake.
16. I know I’ll never be the bad-boy type – but please don’t refer to me as a ‘nice guy’.
17. If you hate my mother, I’ll think less of you. But if you always agree with her, I’ll also think less of you.
18. Yeah, it’s annoying you take so long to get ready – but when you look so fantastic, all is forgiven.